Saturday, September 27, 2008

In Shia We Trust.........

First off, with a name like Shia. The person will either be a super hermit home-schooled weirdo or a super cool action funny guy who saves the world all the time. If you picked the second one, you are thinking of Shia Labeouf. Why is his weird last name so hard to spell? I bet it's french. Grrrrr The French!

Anyway, I have noticed alot of things. Shia has lately in past movies is saving us from something. He saved us from alien robots destroying the planet in Transformers. He saved us from a serial killer in Disturbia. He saved us from a jerk surfer in Surfs Up. He saved teenage criminals from a digging holes in the Texas desert to find a treasure for a crooked warden in Holes. He saved his family from a phony boleny with musturd on top reality tv show in The Even Stevens Movie. For the record, Evens Stevens was frickin awesome! Clearly a show ahead of its time in the golden years of disney channel with awesome original movies like Brink and Jumping Ship. Now disney is crap. Btw, does anyone else remember Zoog Disney and shows like The Famous Jet Jackson and The Jersey.

I'm off topic. Back to Shia. He saved us from aliens and The Soviets in Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. I think they want shia to take Indy's place since Harrison Ford is like 65 years old or something. That is a scary thought. The great name of Indiana Jones will be tarnished even more if Mutt(aka Shia) is the new Indy.

Shia also saves us from the "Eagle Eye". I saw the movie and it was pretty good. I snuck in the theatre just because I wanted to save money. Do I owe shia money or something? When i saw the movey, there were alot of other C list celebrities who have small parts in it. Billy Bob Thorton is in it, so is Jeff Garlend, Shia of course, the lead singer of Buckcherry, and I'm sure there are some others but I missed them. I laughed at Billy Bob for trying to play a FBI agent.

I wonder what shia will save us from in the future? I know Transformers 2 is coming out but its a sequal. There is a 50% chance it will be lame. I think Shia will save us from drug dealers or something like Mel Gibson in Lethal Weapon. It's funny how a goofy funny kid named Louis Stevens turns into a serious beard-baring action saving the world stud.

Move over Bruce Willis. It is Shia's turn to shine!

Monday, September 15, 2008

Enter the Matrix

So today in Algebra 2 I got to use the fancy pants graphing calculator, class set addition. While I was fiddling around and not paying attention(I should pay attention more, I got a 76 in that class), I came across something. There was this application that said Matrix. Now, I tried seeing the movie the matrix(the first one) on two separate occasions, I fell asleep twice at the same part. The part where the agents captured that one smart black dude Morpheus. I press enter on the Matrix application not knowing what will happen.

I was hoping that Neo and/or Morpheus would make my math classroom portable explode or a part of it was ripped off in a wild and crazy hurricane, then Morpheus and/or Neo would fly like Superman in the classroom to get me. I didn't finish the first movie or ever watch the others so I have no idea what happens to Morpheus or Neo. So I was anxious waiting for something to happen like agents burst in to capture me and reveal that the reality I know is a lie. Then suddenly to be rescued by revolutionaries in the future in the Nebukazzer.

But sadly, the screen on my calculator that could be my gateway to the real world kepting saying "Waiting.........waiting.........waiting..........". I guess I will never know what would have happened. I could be the next Keanue Reaves.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Jo Bro Syndrome

So if you don't already know already. I like the Jonas Brothers' music. Although I didn't like Love Bug at the VMAs or Burning up. The unisex version of songs that the Jo Bros have like That's the Way We Roll are good. Burning Up is a song just designed for the 97% girls audience. My favorite Bro is Kevin. I actually once while walking into a Blockbuster with some friends said very loudly, " Kevin Jonas is my hero!". About the time I finished my sentenced, 3 attractive girls walked past me and burst out laughing. I don't know why people don't like Kevin. He is the glue to the group. He makes the others look good by being really ugly and having no singing ability(I realized they turn off his mic at the shows). He must be the best guitarist out of the Bros but it would be ironic and funny if Nick was better. I wonder if their little brother when he becomes older will be the 4th Bro and play drums or play the keyboard(or the keytar).

Usually when I tell people I like the Bros, they look at me like I have a horse's butt for a face. Today a guy on my bus heard me say I like the Jonas Brothers and he said, " Alright, give up your man card to me. "
I replied, " I don't know............it's pretty big." I don't know if that made sense or not. I'm just random and strange manboy.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Men Should Wear Bras

So my mind was being random today at school so I pieced together the following:

Purple. Sounds like nurple. Nurple means purple nipple. Which is caused by twisting the pectoral chest area. Men often give eachother nurples because if they did it to girls, it would be considered sexual harassment. It's not possible for girls to give eachother nurples because they have the proctection of a padded bra. Men should have a brassiere to protect themselves against the pain of getting a "titty twister". But only fat men are able to wear bras because they have a boobie size big enough for one. They should be ok with it because if they are really obese, they have just stopped caring. Why don't I see more fat men on the streets wearing bras?

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Canadian Hunter

Hola everyone. Como estas? That is spanglish for hello everyone, whats up?!
anyway, i thought it was a good idea to talk about a certain subject I adore very much.
I practically made it a sport myself. I call it Canadian Bashing. You see, I am from the great state of Washington. That is washington state, not DC. Everytime someone asks me if I'm from DC i feel like smacking a melted slab of chocolate on their faces and eating the delicious chocolate right in front of their faces to watch them suffer. Any, while I spend every summer there, I usually find some Canadian people. Usually it happens at my christian bible overnight co-ed summer camp. The camp has week sessions and I go a week out of my summer there. Usually I get one canadia-an in my cabin(we actually sleep in bunks in wood cabins with a tarp for a door and sleep in sleeping bags with a max of 10 guys). But this year I got lucky, I had 4 Canadia-ans. I was a happy guy. Plus we had a small cabin composed of 6 guys counting me.

Now, during this time. I made as many Canada jokes as possible. I don't hate canadians, one my best buds that i met there(who looked exactly like Ryan aka RyRy158 except the guys we total opposites). It was fun when he would play along with the jokes. Some of the jokes were like when they pulled out there Canadian coloured money, I would say stuff like, "Where did you get the monopoly money?" "So is your pet beaver named Chuck?" " I'm soarry but I don't know what you are talking aboot, eh?". ANd the list continues.

Also I go to Canada every year to go to the waterslides. Before we crossed the border, i had to stop to get an energy drink. My little brother's friend asked me if I was going to pay with Canadian loonies. I just responded, " NO. I'm using REAL money." He found it quite funny.

I should be giving Canadia-ans a break but they are just too fun to mess with. It's kind of like a guilty pleasure. And the weird part is that I'm a %25 Canadian.

This is all I have to say on my first public blog. I hope you enjoyed it.